cheryl
Administrator
Staff member
This is the right way to challenge someone’s thinking - Fast Company
If you want to share your perspective in a way that gets heard, and acted upon to create positive change, try these three steps.
It’s natural to feel angry when someone says or writes something that we find offensive. Lashing out may feel satisfying in the moment. But if our goal is actually to change the person’s mind or get them to reconsider their approach, assailing their intentions or labeling them (an idiot, a classist, a narcissist, etc.) is often counterproductive.
Over the years, I’ve occasionally gotten emails from newsletter readers upbraiding me for various reasons. One woman, reacting to a reference to “recent business travel” shortly after the pandemic began, declared my email to be “insensitive and harmful . . . You should be ashamed of yourself. This email offends me.”
Another, angry that I cited an example of someone’s boss yelling at them as a “setback,” declared that my writing reeked of “first world, white-privilege traumas.” When people feel offended—whatever the cause—they may not always be polite.
If you want to share your perspective in a way that gets heard, and acted upon to create positive change, try these three steps.
It’s natural to feel angry when someone says or writes something that we find offensive. Lashing out may feel satisfying in the moment. But if our goal is actually to change the person’s mind or get them to reconsider their approach, assailing their intentions or labeling them (an idiot, a classist, a narcissist, etc.) is often counterproductive.
Over the years, I’ve occasionally gotten emails from newsletter readers upbraiding me for various reasons. One woman, reacting to a reference to “recent business travel” shortly after the pandemic began, declared my email to be “insensitive and harmful . . . You should be ashamed of yourself. This email offends me.”
Another, angry that I cited an example of someone’s boss yelling at them as a “setback,” declared that my writing reeked of “first world, white-privilege traumas.” When people feel offended—whatever the cause—they may not always be polite.