How to Prevent Impostor Syndrome in Your Child

cheryl

cheryl

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How to Prevent Impostor Syndrome in Your Child - Psychology Today

The culture of perfectionism makes our kids feel that they can never measure up.

Each year, more kids tell me how stressed they are at school because they can never be good enough. By the time they are teens, many of them are describing symptoms of the impostor phenomenon, the secret suffering of 25-30% of high performers. Parents who have been successful yet have struggled with the pain of feeling like an impostor themselves worry they will pass this to their own kids. How can parents prevent impostor syndrome in their kids?

First described by Dr. Pauline Rose Clance in the 1980s, the impostor phenomenon (IP) is a cluster of symptoms that cause profound suffering. People with IP are high performers who are objectively successful but can’t feel it. They believe they are frauds and will be found out. They attribute their success to luck and not to their own talents. Even when praised, they discount that praise, believing they don’t deserve it. “If only people really knew,” they say to themselves, “they’d see I’m not smart after all.”
 
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